Caption Contest: Full-Auto Outboard

by Dylan Polk | July 18, 2012

193

This week's G&A Caption Contest features an ever-vigilant protector of the seas and his valiant vessel. Caption this photo before Saturday, July 21 to win!

The Winning Caption:

Tiff

Take no prisoners! Mostly...since...well...they won't fit...

The Prize:

Allen Flat-Bottom Duffle Bag

With a 3,400 cubic inch capacity, this heavy duty duffle in Oak Brush Green is perfect for any outdoorsman. For more, check out Allen Company!

Rob

Taliban Navy adopts a disguise in an attempt to get close to US Navy vessels.
- dale
  
  Sorry, MOM could'nd make it………..
SamF1911

This is the kind of duty one can expect to get when caught dating the admiral's daughter.
Catfish Jimmy

The Coast Guard's new "Rubber Ducky" does make bath time so much fun!
- magoo
  
  Nah thats "50 Canadian" on the niagara river,
connor

MAN! I hate these budget cuts!!
chris s

coast guard, patrolling a bath tub near you!
Steve

Give it full throttle, this baby's got some kick.
Johnnie W. Brame

".50 cal propulsion"!!!!!
Mac

The United State war on drugs funds got cuts instead of multi manned water craft that can only patrol small areas now they're going to personal one man watercrafts that can be everywhere at once. GOP math 1 big boat + 100 men = $$$$$$$$$$$ and 1 personal boat + 1 man=$
Nosfer6

When they said this boat was for demonstration purposes only they weren't kidding!
Chuck Taylor

I'll protect the pond mama and make sure the bastards don't take it over.
SamF1911

We're gonna need a bigger boat.
Mike K. Calgary

"Swamp People" – Zombie Upgrade.
Nosfer6

And this is just the dinghy, wait till you see the mothership!
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

When it came to armament, Ensign Smith over-compensated for his little dinghy.
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Let's show the Navy how its done. Which way to the Straight of Hormuz?
- https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm
  
  How about the 'Strait of Hormuz'?
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Any Somali pirates who make it to the U.S. coast will rue the day they crossed paths with Commander Chaos!!
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Belt-fed machine gun for coastal defense – check. Ultra-quiet trolling motor for sentry duty – check. Helmet and full-face visor for seagull-poop control – check!
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

I hate when they call my boat "Segway of the Sea"!
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Eddie's annoying habit of singing sea shanties off-key earned him his own patrol boat.
Captain Nemo

Due to the increasing budget deficit, the Obama administration has come up with some novel ways to contain costs…
Iblis

Elmer Fudd knew that Daffy wasn't getting away this time.
Iblis

Bob's constant diet of Broccoli Tacos had finally earned him a new post
JamesWalkiewicz

This is how the coast guard hunts birds.
JamesWalkiewicz

A mounted 50 cal. can make anything look awesome and dangerous! Previously: a tractor. This week: a boat. Next week: a ______________.
- Mike K. Calgary
  
  …………" a blonde with large breasts." But then again, she already is awsome and dangerous.
Tanner w

Game and fish has Really stepped it up this year!
JamesWalkiewicz

Who says a 50 cal. is overkill for duck hunting? Not the coast guard!
mike johnson

Life boats…….yes sometimes even the USCG needs them too
mike johnson

Fed up with the Geese in his pond farmer Johnson came up with a plan…….:..
Mike K. Calgary

Top Secret picture of a new Water Transportation Floating drone.
mike johnson

Sitting there thinking about how it ended up like this he thinks maybe drinking like a salor and toilet papering master chief thompsens house wasn't such a good idea after all
double tap tommy

"Hey you kids get off my pond!" Clint Eastwood in "Marino" Torino2.
double tap tommy

I'm having trouble with this one because all I can think of is where can I get one!
double tap tommy

Electric trawling motor, environmentally friendly.
Bullet riddled drug running cigarette boat sinking on the coral reef?
not so much..
double tap tommy

I think Ensign Quint might be afraid of sharks.
double tap tommy

After viewing the trailer for the new "Old Man and the Sea" remake it was clear Hollywood was not staying true to Hemmingway's classic novel.
double tap tommy

I think Ensign Ahab might be afraid of whales.
Shambo

This is what Chuck Norris played with as a child while taking his baths.
Mike K. Calgary

Security at the boatel parking lot.
Mike K. Calgary

B.ig O.ld A.merican T.ricksy.
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

"Bring enough boat" lags behind "Bring enough gun".
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

C.P.O. Ahab searching the beaches for Rosie, the Great White Whale.
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

"Call me Ishmael with a Vengeance".
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Rub-a-dub-dub meets Rat-a-tat-tat.
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Hawaii Five-O BMG
http://www.facebook.com/joehbro Joe Brown

I think we're gonna need a bigger boat… but the gun is good.
Frank Szabo

Thanks, O'Bungle!
Jeff Brady

Them Blue Gill don't stand a chance
Tiff

Hey! It looks bigger in the dark…
Tiff

You WISH you had my job!
Tiff

Take no prisoners!

Mostly…since…well…they won't fit…
- dylan_polk
  
  Tiff,
  
  Congratulations! You're the winner.
  
  Email me at dylan.polk@imoutdoors.com with your address and contact information to receive your prize.
  
  Thanks,
  
  Dylan Polk
  G&A Online Editorial Assistant
Greg

JoinThe New Fresh Water Navy "Protecting Our Nation One Puddle At A Time"
Nosfer6

Our last line of defense against the Asian carp invasion!
Conrad

How to keep drunk and crazy boaters away from you on Lake Lanier.
Kevin

Mamma told me there would be days like this!!!
Charles Chapman

Always "bring enough gun"….always….
Gonkinator

France sends her help in the war on terror.
DVG

THIS ! IS ! SPARTA !!!
DVG

I'll keep my gun, my freedom, and my… erm… vehicle.
Ross

Yes, I said "Ol tub", but this is not what I meant.
psymanagement

ATTENTION: THIS IS A NO WAKE ZONE
Gerald Benard

Dear Ms. Sheila Jackson-Lee of Texas: this, my dear, is an assault rifle…
hijinx60

Hey, Leon!! Duck season opened at daylight. Hurry and get you fat a$$ in the boat.
Meenguy

This is the swiftboat that I was referring to, stated John Kerry.
Leppell

Eat your heart out George Washington.
csluder

I guess fishing with dynomite is a thing of the past!!
Tom

Me and my Texas gun boat on a budget.
Joshua Frost

The Coast Guard was holding GI Joe tryouts for the upcoming movie.
Noah

Why does Canada have a Navy? So the US Coast guard has somebody to poke fun at!
Russ

Bass Master
https://www.facebook.com/bob.meluskey.sr Bob Meluskey

a ma duece keeping our local city swimming pools free from illegals
http://www.facebook.com/DarkS7ar Mike Posey

Editor Jim Bequette and the early days of the Guns and Ammo Yacht Club.
ryansmith16

What really sank the titanic
Cody

Puddle Pirate fast attack boat, because when the water is this shallow you don't need a ship.
Steve

Budget Cuts!
Kenneth Johnson

Well we finally have a volunteer to put a stop to the Iranians threatening to stop the oil export from the straits of Hormus!!!
David

A little slow going forward, but man it has a hasty retreat when you light up this puppy!!!
t williame

pull trigger for reverse
Regan Bullard

Coast Guard technological innovation: Electric to go forward, Smokeless powder for reverse.
Anthony Grindle

This new stealth boat is ready to kick ass !!!
Rob

"Because Shooting Fish out of a Barrel is just too Easy"
mdillingham

Pull the "TRIGGER" and you won"t need the trolling motor..
http://twitter.com/TydWonon @TydWonon

Twist knob for forward. Pull trigger for reverse.
Jean Hetherington

When asked if a "Leaner-Meaner" military could really be effective, the administration looked at the evidence and said, "NO COMMENT".
http://twitter.com/TydWonon @TydWonon

Recent budgetary concerns have "reduced" the size of the Coast Guard fleet.
wade

new us olympic training motivation apparatus.
Steven E.

What?….. This was the only paddle boat they had left, I swear!
Micheal Smith

United States Coast Guard, protecting our waterways since 1790!
Terence

His other vehicle is a Prius.
Bill

Preparing to board Oil Tanker of the Coast of Iran.
Ray

Check it out… they pimped my dingy!
F. Bruno

Semper Paratus!!! Molon Labe!!! (Always Ready!!! Come and Get It!!!)
Michael T.

"Man, I never shoulda made fun of General Smith's lisp. Guarding the Fort Knox Reservoir sucks."
ChiefT

DOT budget cuts hit the Coast Guard hard.
william

ma–duece on the loose
Jeff

The Tidy Bowl man seeks vengeance for countless flushes.
http://www.facebook.com/jeffreypriest Jeffrey Priest

Coast Guard to experiment with Low Speed High Drag.
Ben

"Go ahead, cross my border, you won't like my friend here or my American hospitality"
Scot Murtha

This is the weight watchers program for the Coast Gard
chiefs69

Here Nessie, here Nessie, come here girl.
dugiboy

Mitt Romney taking another deposit offshore . Better safe than sorry !
drhiggins90

S.S. John Kerry! Next, I bet he'll tell you that he took out an Iranian fleet with this little diddy.
Rolsen614

"It's not the size of the boat that matters, it's what you've got strapped to it!"
john

I am so sick of these %*# damn FLYING CARP!
MichaelDunbar

Due to budget cuts, the Coast Guard presence on Kentucky and Barkley Lakes will be somewhat……..diminished.
CanuckGunNut

Throttle for forward, recoil for reverse
John Silvis

My Gun pushes me faster backward the the motor goes forward.
Edward Bleistein

The latest equipment deployed by the US Coast Guard to protect our inland waterways and ports is an extremly quiet and leathal one man craft . However ineffective in rough water, but the guards stand by the motto (Bring Enough Gun)
Reggie

he was in Cuba when his boat lost power. the Cubans went after him and he shot at them and found himself back in U.S. territory!
reggie

everytime I shoot, the boat moves faster!
reggie

where is that monster fish I've heard so much about?
http://www.facebook.com/ed.johnson.79274 Ed Johnson

Coast Guard suffers Obama cutbacks, forced to buy Mexican firearms through "Fast & Furious" deal.
Jeff

Now lets put it in reverse
William

Who says "We need a bigger boat"
Jesse

Coast Guard Commando
Jeff S

1 Canoe Wreckin Crew
cavebabe13

Now let's see that fish get away………………
Bill Goulet

President Obama announced today that the budget cuts to the Coast Guard would not affect National Security because we were able to order three times as many security vessels from China than we could have bought here in the US.
Jon B

Ha!! Like who needs an outboard!!??
steve

you want some,OK meet my lil friend
steve

you think this is somethin,you should see my 16fter
Jason Vorce

"Here we see the coast guard testing their new experimental 50 caliber watercraft propulsion system."
lajemac

The Coast Guard suffers MORE government cutbacks.
cyanide909

either cut the boat budget or the gun budget
CGochanour

I dare an Asian Carp to try and knock me out of my boat!
Kurt Hausch

Another day aboard the U.S.S. Expendable
Ian

Coasties do it best, enough said
- Ian
  
  When ports shut down, when the U.S. Navy won't go out and when god himself rips the roofs off houses the USCG is ALWAYS READY.
  
  BM2
ROOKHSD1

OK BITCHES ……WHO'S NEXT ……
Eugene

I don't know why i leave the fight faster than I got there!
http://www.facebook.com/donovan.vest Donovan Vest

You know that word overkill? Me neither.
Dave

Feeling left out Utah starts their own Coast Guard.
TOD4869

After we pay off our debt to China!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Someonedude

Swift Boat Version 1.0
Someonedude

The Dingy that could.
Raymond Goodell

They cut our budget but we can still kick butt.
Someonedude

Small Dingy or Big Gun?
dallas197530

Size doesn't matter, it's the way you use it.
Nitemare182

Fuel is scarce in some places. Introducing the brand new , .50 caliber propulsion system
TOD4869

SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND
Robert_59

Wanna make fun of my boat? Go ahead, make my day.
viv !

I ain't letting the big one get away this time !
Betsy

"Another one of Obama's cuts to the coast guard funding!"
Randy

Our military will look like this "A.O." (after Obama)
betsy

"You say its NOT the size that counts but the motion of the ocean?" Well lets just cover both those areas just to be safe!
Cyrus Jeffers

Shhh!!! Be Vewy Vewy Quiet I'm Covertly hunting Dwug Wunners hehehehehe!!!
Nosfer6

Guns and Ammo's next publication, Machine Guns and Ammo.
Sponsored in part by the US Coast Guard.
Danny Twork

I keep having to cross this lake because the damn recoil pushes me back faster than the Troling Motor can push me forward.
Coastie Mom

WHAT?? My son told me he was going to be training on a SHIP……..you call THIS a SHIP?
TCAUTOMOTIVE

Coastguard receives new funding for purchase of highly advanced vessels to include this "CHPCRP-007" Multipurpose Terrorist Defense System. This model is equipped with the optional "50 Cal Propulsion System" for high speed easy maneuverability. Also pictured here is the standard rear mounted "Minkota Diver Deterrent System" which will be included with all five of the new vessels.
http://www.facebook.com/aellis5280 Aaron Ellis

The coast gaurd (ZART) Zombie Apocalypse Response Team launches their first ship!
http://www.facebook.com/scott.hedrick.31 Scott Hedrick

forget the engine my gun will propel me.
Jan Bedell

Where's Tim the Toolman Taylor when you need him ??? More POWER !!! grunt grunt grunt grunt
travis boyd

I knew I should have joined the Marines….
marc

We don't need no stinkin bigger boat, watch this !

OK, Where is that Japanese whaling ship ?

What do you mean "No man is an island "
jan kevin clarence

Budget cuts small boat big gun
Kat

Enemy Fish Approaching Sir.
http://www.facebook.com/mark.ferguson.3956 Ferguson Mark

the big ship with all the cargo containers and the destoyer escort?
-Matt

Chuck Norris’ Tidy Bowl Man !
Meatball758

Damn Boudreaux, every time i choot my gun de dang bout go backwards…
Meatball758

Damn Boudreaux, i just got dun pootin dem finishing touches on my autoramatic rod and reel.. You tink dem Bass Masters store guy's wuld wanna buy my idea???
Meatball758

Awwwe Cher' i told u im gonna beat dem Bill Dance an dem Jimmy Houston in dem Bass Tournement dis weekend no???
_Ray

After years of research we are getting closer to the perfect firepower to vehicle ratio.
Mike

Not-so- Swift boat
Steve

Boom
Eric

Does this helmet make me look silly?
Walt Sved

On full automatic, this thing will do 40mph – backwards!!
Jim

This part of the Rio Grande sure is beautiful in the morning!
Nosfer6

Bob agreed to re-up but this time it was only for a three hour tour!
Paul

U.S.S. GUPPY SHARK, tiny little fellow with a big bite.
GaryB_45

Said hello to my little friend !!!
Ryan

It's all about priorities.
jmb

every time I shoot my m2 I end up across the bay. I wish I had an anchor
Mthoffman11

Thank you Obama forgiving illegal aliens healthcare, now I have to drive a hybrid!
Eric

While not as lethal as the Navy’s Seal Team Six, the Coast Guard’s Otter Team 6 has espirit de sputter.
Mack Missiletoe

In Soviet Russia, cereal box prizes contain assault boats and a military contract.
John

Prepare to be boarded!
https://www.facebook.com/stephen.malm Stephen Malm

Hey – Get off my lawn!
Ray Marksberry

Anybody seen the @#?*ing BISMARK?
Michael Pratt

this will be the Last time those needle fish steal my bait
Michael Pratt

>":>*BUZZZzzcrackle":">* Castro I think this is gonna work theres no way we can loose ":">*Crackle>"::":*
Michael Pratt

BUZZzzz"">* they wont know the difference"":>Crackle}:*
Csluder

Surviving the cut "Pond Patrol"
https://www.facebook.com/marshall.briggs Marshall Briggs

New Jersey Mosquito control
762BodyDropper

Now I can shoot and back up at the same time!
Tony Christiansen

Those ducks are so dead!!
Barry

Canadian Navy
getmetoeswet

Some of us related to dad better after the dementia took hold.
mtatw

This gives the word "DINGY" a whole new meaning…. cause it goes much faster in reverse when firing than when full speed ahead.